Her beauty and the moonlight overthrew you

[dharmalady]

Juliet Scott was married for five years. Three of them were good. She was young, Damien was too. They were in love and carefree; had fun and had a lot of sex, traveled to a lot of places. She'd been on track to start med school but when she met Damien, she wanted him instead, and she thought she'd always choose him over everything.

Until she got pregnant.

He stuck around for a few months but then, conveniently his job took him away and the stretches of time between being home and being gone were longer. He was never a bad dad to Mia, not once, but it was like a chore to be home, to be a husband and civilian again. Juliet missed him but she tried to talk to him about it and it was a fight, every time. He had a job, he had missions, he couldn't just give that up. So she decided a year and a half ago to not make him choose anymore. She sent him divorce papers, certified mail, with a letter explaining to him that she was tired of feeling like she and Mia weren't a priority. Like he didn't want to be there when he was back in the states. She wasn't surprised when she got the signed paperwork back with no note in response.

She and Mia have been solo ever since, the two of them moving to Miami to be closer to Juliet's sister. Med school finally happens, and now Juliet's an intern and Mia is five. It's been hard, harder than Juliet ever thought she'd have to do on her own, but she's doing it. She's never told Damien he can't be a part of Mia's life, she's never tried to keep him away from her. When she moves, she makes sure someone in his branch of the military, wherever he is, gets her address. She's not even angry at him anymore, just sad that it ended this way between them.

Comments

[inthewar]

"I know I wasn't thinking when I said it, but...she was scared and she came to me and when she asked if I was leaving again...fuck. I couldn't. I couldn't. I wanted to say anything to make her feel better."

He lifts his head and just takes a deep breath.

"Get some sleep."

[dharmalady]

"You were always really good at saying things that sounded amazing in the moment," Juliet says quietly, then lets out a breath. "Goodnight."

She disappears into her room, not sleeping a whole lot, trying to trust that Damien's going to really do this.

[inthewar]

Yeah. Good at saying things to make someone feel better. Following through with actions? Not so much. And he knows it.

He goes to check on Mia, kneeling next to her bed and stroking her hair a little, kissing her temple before he goes to bed.

[dharmalady]

About two weeks later, Juliet calls Damien around one in the afternoon, emotional, but trying to keep it together.

"I need you to pick up Mia from school," she says, voice tight. "Rachel's dying, I'm trying to get to house before she does."

[inthewar]

"Fuck. Okay. I'll get her," he nods into the phone, even knowing Juliet can't see him. "Hang in there, Jules."

[dharmalady]

"Thank you, Damien," she says quietly, just exhausted and upset already. When she gets home, it's not until after seven, and her eyes are red-rimmed and swollen. But she tries her best to only focus on Mia, not even sure how to tell her, but Juliet decides to do it while Damien's in the room, for support.

"Baby," Juliet starts softly. "You know...Aunt Rachel didn't feel very good, for a long time?"

[inthewar]

Mia just looks up at her with wide, innocent eyes, but she knows something is wrong because mommy looks so sad.

She nods a little. "Mommy, you're crying." Her little hand reaches out, fingers stroking her cheek.

[dharmalady]

"That's because I'm sad, sweetheart," she says softly. "Mia, Aunt Rachel died today." All she does now is pause and wait for Mia to process and ask questions.

[inthewar]

Mia's eyes get so wide, and she looks at her daddy for a moment, then back at her mommy. "She...she can't come back?" She's trying to understand, her little mind trying to process this.

[dharmalady]

"No, baby. She can't," Juliet says softly, trying so damn hard not to cry. "But I know she loved you so much."

[inthewar]

He can see by the look on her face that she's struggling so hard, and he hugs Mia a little tighter as their daughter starts to cry.

He steps in, not wanting Juliet to have to keep answering questions. "Baby, she won't feel anymore pain now," he explains. "No more being sick. But you know, you can still talk to her all the time. She'll hear you."

[dharmalady]

"Daddy's right, Mia. Aunt Rachel doesn't have to be sick anymore. But we can still write to her and draw her pictures. I'll send them to her. Okay?" she says softly, reaching out to stroke her hair tenderly.

[inthewar]

Mia cries softly, moving into her mommy's arms, both for comfort and to comfort her. She has such a big heart, and she hates that her mommy is sad.

"Okay, mommy," she sniffles. "I'll make her pictures."

[dharmalady]

Juliet gently rocks her back and forth, kissing her temple and closing her eyes. The funeral is three days later, and Juliet manages to get through it, but that night she opens a bottle of rum and just doesn't stop pouring drinks after Mia's in bed, drinking it straight with no mixer. She's looking through old pictures, so much heavy on her mind, and she doesn't know how to process this overwhelming sadness.

[inthewar]

"Hey," Damien speaks softly, sitting with her, shoulder to shoulder. He's not drinking with her, though, wanting to be a support for her.

[dharmalady]

Juliet's already pretty drunk, and she doesn't move away at all, just leans against him. "Hi," she breathes out, rubbing her face. "I'm...I'm...I hurt," she says mournfully.

[inthewar]

"I know you do," he says softly, reaching out to hold onto one of her hands. "You lost your best friend."

[dharmalady]

Juliet clings to him and breaks down crying, leaning over a little. "I tried to save her. I tried. I couldn't. And now...now I'm alone. I'm alone," she whispers.

[inthewar]

"You're not alone," he says quickly, maybe too quickly. "You're not, Jules. I know I...I haven't been here. I haven't for a long fucking time. But...I'm here now, okay?"

[dharmalady]

Juliet turns to face him and her eyes are so wide and shining because of her tears. And then, without thinking, she reaches out and cradles his face in her hand. "You won't leave me again?" she asks quietly.

[inthewar]

He leans in, kissing her forehead tenderly. He can feel how much pain he's caused. Her walls are down, she can speak openly to him, and he knows how much he's hurt her.

"No, Juliet. I won't leave you or Mia."

[dharmalady]

Juliet looks at him and then she leans in, pressing her lips to his and kissing him, urgently almost, not thinking, drunk, just needing to not feel alone anymore.

[inthewar]

For a moment, he responds without hesitation, leaning in to kiss her. It's a soft kiss, though, meant to soothe. It's tender and affectionate, but he realizes quickly what this could lead to and he can't do this when she's so vulnerable. Pulling back, he strokes her cheek a little with his knuckles.

"You're not alone," he repeats to her, wanting that to sink in.

[dharmalady]

"Good," she whispers quickly, and then she shifts to his lap, kissing him again, over and over, her hands cradling each side of his face as she does. "Damien, I need you. I need this, please."

[inthewar]

Fuck, when she shifts to his lap, he's a goner. For a moment, he can't think straight. He never thought she'd want him like this again, that her lips would be pressing to his with such heat and desperation.

It takes all of his resolve to not give in, and he gently pushes her back. "Honey, we can't do this. You're not thinking straight."